Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Steps to Make a Bank Transfer

This second how-to blog takes a fairly simple transaction and makes it into a monumental task. It is also complicated by our poor French. To make a transfer at home, we went to our bank and transferred the money. Notice there are more steps for this one than to buy a car.

Steps to Make a Bank Transfer:

1. Have party requesting transfer send all relevant details via email.
2. Save transfer information from internet onto memory stick.
3. Find store in town to print from memory stick.
a. Discover information has not been saved.
4. Return home to save information. Return to store. Print information needed.
5. Find bank to make transfer.
a. Discover bank will not transfer money because your account is in another country but you may be able to do this online.
6. Go home to internet.
7. Log in to website for internet banking.
8. Fill out lengthy form using information printed.
a. Note you need bank address which is not on form so surf to find out address.
b. Discover you may not transfer this much money but if you call this number you can increase your limit.
9. Look for telephone.
10. Dial number on screen.
a. Listen to very garbled French.
11. Search for French speaking native to listen.
a. Discover the number does not exist.
12. Ask how to dial a number to Canada from France.
a. Discover you are dialing without the correct prefix.
13. Dial number with correct prefix.
14. Talk to bank representative for twenty minutes at your own expense to get details needed.
a. Miss one step and lose entire form previously filled out.
15. Reload page to get new form and fill out again while bank representative waits.
a. Lose connection on phone
16. Redial number.
a. Listen to very garbled French.
17. Search for French speaking native to listen.
a. Discover phone has no more credit.
18. Look for second telephone.
a. Discover second telephone needs to be recharged.
19. Look for phone recharge cord. Plug second phone in.
a. Discover one cannot use a phone while it is recharging.
20. Search online for page to top up credit on first telephone.
a. Discover page is in French.
21. Use French/English dictionary to navigate way through website to find top-up area.
22. Create account for online top-up.
23. Choose credit amount desired and fill in details of credit card for payment.
a. Credit card declined as online password may not be correct.
24. Choose different credit card and fill in details.
a. Credit card declined as one must use Mastercard only.
25. Choose third credit card and fill in details.
a. Credit card declined as Mastercard is not French.
26. Seek out phone card in hostel.
a. Discover hostel does not sell phone cards
27. Ask where nearest Tabac is located and what time it closes
a. Vague direction and not sure of closing
28. Go out to find Tabac
a. After five minute walk, admit defeat as it is now 9pm
29. Return to room and attempt to use second telephone which is recharging
a. Discover telephone will now make call
30. Get online while calling bank with second telephone to explain the situation to different bank representative.
a. Discover password is rejected on personal bank website and access is denied.
b. Get put on hold to wait for rep to put through transfer.
31. Wait for bank representative to return until phone goes dead.
a. Discover second telephone has no more credit.
32. In morning, drive out to Tabac taking longer to drive than walk as an accident has shut down roadway.
a. Buy large money credit for phone
33. Attempt to put money on phone
a. Listen to very garbled French
34. Seek help at Tabac and have clerk put money onto phone
35. Return to computer and internet
36. Call bank representative to explain transfer and new problem of personal bank site inaccessibility.
a. Resolve inaccessibility issue
b. Confirm transfer limit has been raised and transfer is possible.
37. Make transfer with bank representative instructions.
38. Email party to whom transfer is to be sent to let them know it is coming
39. Receive email in two days stating accounts are frozen due to security check but if you call the number given, they’ll continue your transaction.
a. Note that email must be checked at café now as no internet is available in residence at this time.
40. Return home to get telephone and account information.
41. Call bank to confirm security details and continue with transaction.
42. Wait two days and check email in café to see if transfer has gone through
a. Discover online banking is unavailable because they are upgrading the website.
b. Repeat step 42
i. Discover wire transfer was successful

5 comments:

maryanncart said...

Do you think buying a car is a good idea? Love Mom

Rhonda Staples said...

First of all, I just want to say "I'M REALLY GLAD YOU'RE NOT IN EGYPT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!"

And my travel stories that parrallel your recent accounts are titled:
1) Sending a parcel in India
2) Cashing a bank draft in Australia

Isn't it bizarre how some things operate in other countries.

And aren't we blessed to live in Canada :) !!

Steve said...

So I get the sense:
a) never buying another car in France
b) immensely enjoying this car
c) staying in France forever
Au Revoir!

Theresa said...

Ouch. This makes for a great comic sketch. Anyone artistic?

Todd said...

Hi Holly,

I spent my first afternoon at the girls' school shelving books and it made me nostalgic for Rosser--especially because it took about 15 minutes for the librarian to explain to me where everything goes in a library about a quarter of the size of Rosser's. There are different coloured dots on some books (and Caldecott medals count as dots), and now they're thinking they need yet another dot to complicate things further. Anyway, this library is not so therapeutic as Rosser's was.
Your description of the wire transfer was, though. A couple of weeks ago I went to check if some money arrived for us from Canada. I was directed to a window and was told it hadn't. When I got home, I noticed a three-day-old message on my phone alerting me that the money had arrived. I went back the next day (Saturday) and after a long discussion with a manager who was summoned by a teller who gave up trying to tell me why I still couldn't access my money, it became clear that I had been misdirected the previous day. Had I gone to another window to sign for the transfer, then the money would have gone into my account and it would show up at the other window. So what I had been told was impossible had not been impossible Friday, but it was impossible Saturday, because the people at the window I needed take weekends off. Then we left the country for two weeks, and it was just as well.
I read somewhere that long trips are enjoyed most fully in recollection after returning home, but it sounds like you're all enjoying yourselves quite a bit right now. Take care.